Monday, August 30, 2010
The Fun Continues
After dinner, we continued the fun with an impromptu game night. We brought out our old favorites: Twister and Charades. For the first time, I played Twister. I haven't played in years and always resisted here, but last night I was convinced to join in and it was really fun. After a few rounds of twister, we changed to charades. It was the Maguecks (Dinka for frog) vs the Dik-Diks. I was a Magueck and sadly...we got smoked by the Dik-Diks. It was very fun. Everyone played and it was a good time of fellowship and compound unity.
Photo Shoot
The boys on the compound love to take photos of themselves. Most of the pictures are funny, silly shots but a few are of them posing like models. Margaret and I tease them about it. Last weekend we “borrowed” Dennis' camera and took some of our own. We took funny ones and a few poses as well... taking our inspiration from them.
Yesterday, we all joined together to take some silly pictures. It was good timing because some of us were tired and feeling a little down. I actually had an “I want to be home moment” so this helped to lighten the mood. We laughed so much! I love to take funny photos with my friends back home and I am so grateful for my new friends here who aren't afraid to be silly either.
(In Trouble)
(Superman)
(Kung Fu)
(Lifting George. I don't know why our guard is holding the umbrella in the background!)
(Psycho)
(Dinka Dancing)
(Don't Mess With Me)
(Tah-Dah!)
(Dancing)
(The Crew)
(Two Headed Monster)
Yesterday, we all joined together to take some silly pictures. It was good timing because some of us were tired and feeling a little down. I actually had an “I want to be home moment” so this helped to lighten the mood. We laughed so much! I love to take funny photos with my friends back home and I am so grateful for my new friends here who aren't afraid to be silly either.
(In Trouble)
(Superman)
(Kung Fu)
(Lifting George. I don't know why our guard is holding the umbrella in the background!)
(Psycho)
(Dinka Dancing)
(Don't Mess With Me)
(Tah-Dah!)
(Dancing)
(The Crew)
(Two Headed Monster)
Greg and Beverly
We have Beverly and Greg here with us for two weeks. They have been a huge blessing on the compound. Saturday night they showed “Jesus of Nazareth” to the pastors. We transformed their class room into a movie theater. We covered the windows with blankets and set up the projector. The pastors really enjoyed the movie. It's six and a half hours long. They only got through four hours so they will finish the movie next Saturday. Beverly said they were really cute watching the movie. When certain things would happen (like Jesus' birth) they cheered.
On Sunday, Greg preached at our church while Beverly taught Sunday School. They both are gifted in teaching and are passionate about the Word. Beverly taught about Joshua and the walls of Jericho. She set up a town and the kids walked around it seven times with the trumpets they made. We could hear their trumpets from the church. At the end of Sunday School, there was a puppet show. Beverly taught two of the students in the pastors school how to use the puppets. It was fun to see them perform the skit and see the kids' reaction.
On Sunday, Greg preached at our church while Beverly taught Sunday School. They both are gifted in teaching and are passionate about the Word. Beverly taught about Joshua and the walls of Jericho. She set up a town and the kids walked around it seven times with the trumpets they made. We could hear their trumpets from the church. At the end of Sunday School, there was a puppet show. Beverly taught two of the students in the pastors school how to use the puppets. It was fun to see them perform the skit and see the kids' reaction.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
10 Month Update
I have been back from my break in Kenya for over one month now. I thought the transition might be harder, but easing back into life here was simple.
Our truck finally arrived!!! It cleared the boarder with no problems and cost a lot less than we feared it would. We had a lot of fun unpacking it and breaking into the much needed supplies. Although we didn't realize it, we had gotten down to two rolls of toilet paper. God brought it just in time!
Over the summer we had many visitors. I enjoyed getting to know Daniel and Jessica who came for two months, Paul and Elaine who were here for three weeks and Eric and Chris who came for ten days to build a bore hole in Malony where we do weekly medical outreaches. All of them were a huge blessing to have have here.
We are very happy to have a new lab technician from Kenya, George, and a working lab. It came in handy when I was not feeling well recently. After being tested, amoebas and bacteria were found which were causing me to be sick. That helped Dennis prescribe the right medicine. I am feeling much better now. Previously, we would have to guess what was wrong and try different medications or wait to go to Nairobi where we would be tested. What a relief to be able to be tested here and treated quickly. Now we will be able to test our patients and accurately treat them.
This last month has brought a few new ministry opportunities for me. I was able to return to registration for a while. I like it a lot. Interacting with the patients is fun. I have learned enough Dinka to do registration without a translator. I don't mind getting laughed at every time I pronounce someone's name. I do feel bad for the other staff though who have to read my phonetically spelled out patient information!
A month and a half ago there was a scandal involving a local ECS pastor, Peter, and a former employee of ours, Rebecca. Both are in jail and we had the chance to visit them recently. Rebecca is young, pregnant, alone and sad. Seeing her gave me an idea for a prison ministry. Now, Margaret (our senior nurse/midwife) and I are going to the prison every Wednesday to lead a Bible Study and see to the health needs of Rebecca and some of the other prisoners. This past Wednesday I learned about the simplicity and effectiveness of a Bible story. Due to some circumstances at the prison that day, I had to abandon the study I planned and just told the story of Joseph. It really seemed to encourage the ladies who are in the midst of a very hard situation.
Today, Beverly and I held a women's workshop. It was open to any woman that wanted to come. We had thirteen women come and had a great time. Our goal was to encourage them and pray for them. They were very open about some of the burdens they carry and enjoyed hearing from the Scriptures. We'll be doing it again next Saturday and I am praying about continuing the meeting after Beverly leaves.
We are in the midst of malaria season and our clinic has been packed with sick people. Dennis, our senior clinical officer, is alone and often sees 130-150 patients per day. We thank God for the opportunity to help so many people.
Right now Sabet, Suzy and the kids are on vacation in Kenya. They will return in 10 days and bring along Mike and Amy Yordt. Mike and Amy were on both teams with me from Rancho del Rey and have been called to serve here full time. We are very excited to have them join the In Deed and Truth team.
Prayer Requests:
1.That Sabet and Suzy will be able to rest in Kenya despite all the work they have to
do there.
2.That I will have wisdom as I oversee the compound during their absence
3.We have another truck coming from Uganda bringing construction supplies for the new clinic. Pray for Gordon and Albino as they purchase materials and load the truck. Pray that it will cross the boarders as easily as the other truck did.
4.That we will find people to finish the new clinic building. Our current clinic is bursting at the seams and we could really use more space.
5.For me as I contemplate my future with In Deed and Truth Ministries. Is God calling me to stay here long term or return to the US to be involved stateside?
6.That God will bring teachers for our pastors school.
Thank you for your consistent prayers. God is moving in Tonj and you are a part of that. Thank you for supporting me so I can be a part of that too. If you want to financially support my work here, following is how to do so:
1.Go to www.indeedandtruth.org. Click on donate and you'll see a my name listed and can designate a donation to me.
2. Mail a check to: In Deed and Truth Ministries, PO Box 51253, Colorado Springs, CO 80949 Please don’t forget to write my name on the memo line. Donations are tax deductible.
As always, check out my blog for more stories and pictures of my life in Tonj: http://www.thisisstaciesblog.blogspot.com/. The In Deed and Truth Ministries website has been recently updated. It's really neat... you should take a look: http://www.indeedandtruth.org. There is even information about me under the “Meet the Missionaries” section … including the fact that I am single. Ha ha.
Until next time...
Many Blessings,
Stacie
Our truck finally arrived!!! It cleared the boarder with no problems and cost a lot less than we feared it would. We had a lot of fun unpacking it and breaking into the much needed supplies. Although we didn't realize it, we had gotten down to two rolls of toilet paper. God brought it just in time!
Over the summer we had many visitors. I enjoyed getting to know Daniel and Jessica who came for two months, Paul and Elaine who were here for three weeks and Eric and Chris who came for ten days to build a bore hole in Malony where we do weekly medical outreaches. All of them were a huge blessing to have have here.
We are very happy to have a new lab technician from Kenya, George, and a working lab. It came in handy when I was not feeling well recently. After being tested, amoebas and bacteria were found which were causing me to be sick. That helped Dennis prescribe the right medicine. I am feeling much better now. Previously, we would have to guess what was wrong and try different medications or wait to go to Nairobi where we would be tested. What a relief to be able to be tested here and treated quickly. Now we will be able to test our patients and accurately treat them.
This last month has brought a few new ministry opportunities for me. I was able to return to registration for a while. I like it a lot. Interacting with the patients is fun. I have learned enough Dinka to do registration without a translator. I don't mind getting laughed at every time I pronounce someone's name. I do feel bad for the other staff though who have to read my phonetically spelled out patient information!
A month and a half ago there was a scandal involving a local ECS pastor, Peter, and a former employee of ours, Rebecca. Both are in jail and we had the chance to visit them recently. Rebecca is young, pregnant, alone and sad. Seeing her gave me an idea for a prison ministry. Now, Margaret (our senior nurse/midwife) and I are going to the prison every Wednesday to lead a Bible Study and see to the health needs of Rebecca and some of the other prisoners. This past Wednesday I learned about the simplicity and effectiveness of a Bible story. Due to some circumstances at the prison that day, I had to abandon the study I planned and just told the story of Joseph. It really seemed to encourage the ladies who are in the midst of a very hard situation.
Today, Beverly and I held a women's workshop. It was open to any woman that wanted to come. We had thirteen women come and had a great time. Our goal was to encourage them and pray for them. They were very open about some of the burdens they carry and enjoyed hearing from the Scriptures. We'll be doing it again next Saturday and I am praying about continuing the meeting after Beverly leaves.
We are in the midst of malaria season and our clinic has been packed with sick people. Dennis, our senior clinical officer, is alone and often sees 130-150 patients per day. We thank God for the opportunity to help so many people.
Right now Sabet, Suzy and the kids are on vacation in Kenya. They will return in 10 days and bring along Mike and Amy Yordt. Mike and Amy were on both teams with me from Rancho del Rey and have been called to serve here full time. We are very excited to have them join the In Deed and Truth team.
Prayer Requests:
1.That Sabet and Suzy will be able to rest in Kenya despite all the work they have to
do there.
2.That I will have wisdom as I oversee the compound during their absence
3.We have another truck coming from Uganda bringing construction supplies for the new clinic. Pray for Gordon and Albino as they purchase materials and load the truck. Pray that it will cross the boarders as easily as the other truck did.
4.That we will find people to finish the new clinic building. Our current clinic is bursting at the seams and we could really use more space.
5.For me as I contemplate my future with In Deed and Truth Ministries. Is God calling me to stay here long term or return to the US to be involved stateside?
6.That God will bring teachers for our pastors school.
Thank you for your consistent prayers. God is moving in Tonj and you are a part of that. Thank you for supporting me so I can be a part of that too. If you want to financially support my work here, following is how to do so:
1.Go to www.indeedandtruth.org. Click on donate and you'll see a my name listed and can designate a donation to me.
2. Mail a check to: In Deed and Truth Ministries, PO Box 51253, Colorado Springs, CO 80949 Please don’t forget to write my name on the memo line. Donations are tax deductible.
As always, check out my blog for more stories and pictures of my life in Tonj: http://www.thisisstaciesblog.blogspot.com/. The In Deed and Truth Ministries website has been recently updated. It's really neat... you should take a look: http://www.indeedandtruth.org. There is even information about me under the “Meet the Missionaries” section … including the fact that I am single. Ha ha.
Until next time...
Many Blessings,
Stacie
Women's Conference
While Sabet is in Nairobi, Greg and Beverly have come here to teach the pastors. They really have heart for the people and ache for them to be instructed in the Word. Today and next Saturday, Beverly is leading a women's workshop. We haven't done one since I arrived and I wasn't sure what to expect. We had it announced last Sunday at the local ECS church and also asked the pastors in the school to invite their wives. It was scheduled to start at 9:00. By 9:30 no women were there so we decided to go and get them. David, the translator for the school, led us to nearby huts where we invited any lady we saw. We also stopped by Elizabeth's house and persuaded her to come with her newborn. We returned to the compound with a few ladies in tow and were happy to see others had already arrived. After 20 minutes or so, even more ladies came. At the end, we had 13 women there.
A few of them I knew and the others I was excited to meet. They led us in a few songs and then Beverly began her discussion. We started by asking if all the ladies knew Jesus. They all said they did and gave testimony of God's presence in their lives. Their testimonies of God's great work was very encouraging to hear. Beverly's desire was for the women to know how much God loves them and understand that God has a plan for them. She read Jeremiah 29:11-13 as well as some other verses.
We held the workshop in our church devotion area. We limited it only to women thinking they wouldn't be open if men were there. David was there to translate because we didn't have a female translator. I don't know if it was because David was there, the close proximity to their house, curiosity or just their desire to know more about the Word, but one by one some of the pastors came over. We eventually had five or six sitting behind the circle of women listening to the lesson. I wondered if I should ask them to leave, but decided not to since the women didn't seem to be bothered by their presence.
The ladies love to talk and share. We didn't need to be worried about them not talking! They seemed to be very encouraged by the words we shared and by the Scriptures we read. At the end, we asked for prayer requests and prayed for each lady. The requests varied, but some of the common themes were sick children, children that lived far away and illnesses affecting the ladies themselves. It was a powerful time of prayer and fellowship. I am excited for next week. They promised more ladies would come and I believe them!
(Crashers)
(Here is Tabitha with her husband, Daniel, who attends the pastor's school. She cooks for the pastors while they are here, but we arranged for someone to cover her so she could attend the workshop. It's nice to see them smiling and affectionate with each other. That is often lacking here. I taught him “Happy wife, happy life” and encouraged him to treat her well.)
Friday, August 27, 2010
Random Photos
Whenever people come, it's neat to see the photos they take. Here are some shots taken by Jessica who was here recently for two months:
The car got stuck on a trip to Malony
This woman was delivering twins. One baby was much smaller than the other.
Here is the smaller one. She was tiny!
A cattle camp
A malnourished child. Since the war ended, it's not common to see that.
I love this picture of Awad. "No problem"
It's very common for young children to be taking care of even younger ones.
The car got stuck on a trip to Malony
This woman was delivering twins. One baby was much smaller than the other.
Here is the smaller one. She was tiny!
A cattle camp
A malnourished child. Since the war ended, it's not common to see that.
I love this picture of Awad. "No problem"
It's very common for young children to be taking care of even younger ones.
He He... Owww
Today I was sitting in my room working on my computer when I heard Michael Jackson songs playing from a radio. Magueck and Acuil were listening to it while doing some construction projects. Apparently, Don Bosco (the local Catholic mission) was doing a Michael Jackson marathon. "Black and White" (one of my favorite MJ songs) came on and I sang along. Then I heard "he he" and "owww." It did not come from the radio... it was Magueck and Acuil! They were copying Michael Jackson. I laughed so hard. It's very strange to be in the middle of Sudan hearing that.
Mary, Rebecca's Mom
Today I had a visit from Mary, Rebecca's mom. She had been to the compound on Sunday and talked with Sabet for a while. I was sick so I missed seeing her. Fortunately, she came back today. She has been walking from the village to Tonj a few times a week to bring food to Rebecca in prison since the food there had been making her sick. Mary has a garden in the village where she has grown ground nuts. Once she harvests them next week, she'll come back to Tonj to be closer to Rebecca.
Mary was very discouraged today. Life has been hard on her since Rebecca's involvement in the scandal. Mary's husband blames Rebecca and took away Mary's bike so she has to walk two hours each way to come to Tonj. He is also refusing to help Mary find a home here. So right now, when Mary comes to Tonj, she doesn't have a place to stay. People are still upset about the scandal and don't want to help her. I see her as just a mom, trying to help her daughter out.
So Mary is worried about a home, worried about food for Rebecca, worried about so many things. She asked me to read her something from the Bible to encourage her. I said I would be glad to and as I walked to my room to get my Bible, I asked the Holy Spirit to give me the verses to share with her. I began with Philippians 4:6,7 which talks about worrying about nothing, praying about everything, thanking God for what he has done and experiencing his peace. Then we looked at Matthew 6:25-34 which tells us not to worry. Just as God provides for the birds and flowers, how much more does he love us? Of course he will provide for us too. Then out of my Bible fell out a small card telling the “Footprints in the Sand” story. I intended to give it to Rebecca on Wednesday, but forgot. God must have known Mary needed it more. So, I showed her my tattoo of footprints and told her the story. Although she doesn't read English, I gave her the card and told her whenever she looks at that card to remember that God carries us through the storms. Then we prayed. She rested her hands on her legs and buried her head in her lap. After we finished praying, I saw that she was crying. Whenever I see someone from here cry, it breaks my heart. This culture is so strong and tough, that when someone cries, you know they are deeply hurting.
Margaret had joined us by then and we invited Mary to come next Wednesday when we see Rebecca again. She said she would. She also said she was leaving feeling more encouraged than when she came. When she was alone in the village, she would cry all the time and bad thoughts would fill her heart and her mind. Now she has good things to fill her heart and mind with. Thank you God for the peace that comes from your word.
Mary was very discouraged today. Life has been hard on her since Rebecca's involvement in the scandal. Mary's husband blames Rebecca and took away Mary's bike so she has to walk two hours each way to come to Tonj. He is also refusing to help Mary find a home here. So right now, when Mary comes to Tonj, she doesn't have a place to stay. People are still upset about the scandal and don't want to help her. I see her as just a mom, trying to help her daughter out.
So Mary is worried about a home, worried about food for Rebecca, worried about so many things. She asked me to read her something from the Bible to encourage her. I said I would be glad to and as I walked to my room to get my Bible, I asked the Holy Spirit to give me the verses to share with her. I began with Philippians 4:6,7 which talks about worrying about nothing, praying about everything, thanking God for what he has done and experiencing his peace. Then we looked at Matthew 6:25-34 which tells us not to worry. Just as God provides for the birds and flowers, how much more does he love us? Of course he will provide for us too. Then out of my Bible fell out a small card telling the “Footprints in the Sand” story. I intended to give it to Rebecca on Wednesday, but forgot. God must have known Mary needed it more. So, I showed her my tattoo of footprints and told her the story. Although she doesn't read English, I gave her the card and told her whenever she looks at that card to remember that God carries us through the storms. Then we prayed. She rested her hands on her legs and buried her head in her lap. After we finished praying, I saw that she was crying. Whenever I see someone from here cry, it breaks my heart. This culture is so strong and tough, that when someone cries, you know they are deeply hurting.
Margaret had joined us by then and we invited Mary to come next Wednesday when we see Rebecca again. She said she would. She also said she was leaving feeling more encouraged than when she came. When she was alone in the village, she would cry all the time and bad thoughts would fill her heart and her mind. Now she has good things to fill her heart and mind with. Thank you God for the peace that comes from your word.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Milestone
This blog is a difficult one for me. It's a sensitive subject and sharing this makes me completely vulnerable. I would rather not share it, but I feel like I should in case it encourages someone reading this. I still struggle with shame over this area and have not completed my journey in fighting this. However, I reached a significant milestone today that has prompted me to do this post. Today I have lost 100 pounds since leaving home October 27th, 2009. I haven't talked about my weight loss a lot because I don't want to be boastful and I don't like to admit how much I had (and still have) to lose. I can say with total honesty that God did all the work. The weight came off so easily that I can only attribute it to God's healing hand on my life. The healing I have received is a big part of my experience here which is why I feel it's appropriate to put it on my blog. I am here to minister to others, but God has been working in me too. Let me start with a devotion I shared in June when I had lost about 80 pounds. Each morning someone shares a devotion with the staff. Everyone attends: missionaries, ex-pat staff and Sudanese staff. This devotion sums up most of what I have experienced in terms of this struggle since arriving in Tonj:
June 10, 2010:
Today I want to share with you part of my testimony. I want to tell you about an issue I struggle with and how God is giving me victory in that area. It's very personal and I didn't want to share it initially and wasn't planning on sharing it ever. However, I read a verse yesterday that seemed to describe what I have been going through and I felt the Holy Spirit telling me to share it. Because it's embarrassing and I am ashamed of that struggle, I still thought about doing another devotion. I tried to prepare for another topic but it wasn't coming together so I gave in and thought more about this verse and prayed about what God wanted me to share.
Let's start with the verse:
Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us.
I have read this verse many times before, but yesterday it had new meaning for me. For many years I have struggled with one particular issue and that is my weight. In America we have access to lots of different types of food. Some is good for you and some is bad for you, even though it tastes really, really good. Often times, the food that is bad for you costs less than the food that is good for you. So, it makes it really easy to eat the bad food. The bad food makes you gain weight and therefore many Americans are overweight. I have to say it's awkward talking about this struggle in a place where most people don't have enough food and no one is overweight.
Not everyone who is overweight is dealing with a sinful habit. However in my case, it became a sin issue. Just like some people here are addicted to alcohol, I became addicted to food. I thought about it all the time and it began to affect my walk with God. As I gained weight, the enemy used that to discourage me. I began to believe his lies that I was worthless, that I was ugly and that no one would ever love me. As a result, I was not confident and was very unhappy with myself. I was ashamed of myself. I would avoid doing many things because I thought people wouldn't like me because of my weight. I lived a very fearful life that stopped me from doing things to serve God. My sin was getting in the way of me doing all I could for the Lord. And I believed the biggest lie of all: this was something I could never conquer.
When I came here, I was determined not to let my weight stop me from serving God to the fullest. I didn't want it to hold me back anymore. There were some difficult moments where the enemy would try to discourage me and make me feel like I couldn't be used here. Whenever those thoughts crept in, I turned to God. I prayed for the strength not to worry about things people said. Who I am does not depend on other people's opinions of me, but only what God thinks of me. My identity doesn't rely on what I look like, but who I am on the inside, through Christ. Because I reclaimed my identity in Christ, I began not to worry so much about my weight. Slowly, God began to heal my heart which had been scarred from many years of hating myself. He helped me rebuke the enemy's lies and I found myself being ok with who I am, because I was not judging myself on the world's standards anymore, but on God's.
As God began to heal me on the inside, he also began to heal me on the outside. I started to lose weight even though I wasn't trying to. Because I was away from the bad food at home, I was more active and drank more water, the extra weight began to fall off.
A couple months ago, Suzy and I started exercising. Yesterday, we ran for a long time (for us) without stopping. That was a big accomplishment for me because I could have never done that before. When we first started, I could barely run one minute. Yesterday, we ran for fifteen minutes without stopping.
So, when I came across this verse, it perfectly symbolized what was going on with my struggle with weight. Let's read it again:
Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us.
I literally am taking off the weight that has slowed me down and became a sin. And we should never forget, people are watching us. We are representatives of Christ and we need to be a good example. Some sins we can hide and people may never know we struggle with them. My sin was out there for all to see. Again, I want to be clear, not everyone with extra weight has a sinful struggle with it, but I do. My self hatred and lack of confidence was not a Christ honoring example for people to see. I still am not all the way there; I have more weight to lose and food will continue to be an area I have to be careful in. But, I need to acknowledge the victory I have received through Christ. I hate looking at pictures of me when I first came here because I am ashamed. However, I don't need to be because God has claimed victory over that area in my life. He still is working in me and I don't need to be ashamed about it.
So, I would encourage you to examine your own lives. See if there is any sin that is holding you back and trapping you. Then pray and ask God to release that sin and claim victory. Never believe Satan's lie that it is too hard to overcome. Nothing is impossible with God. If I can run 15 minutes without stopping which is a true miracle for me, you can over come the sin that is holding you back. And then don't be ashamed to tell people about it. Be proud of God's work in your life.
Since sharing that devotion, I have lost an additional 20 pounds and was able to jog (slowly!) for 40 minutes without stopping. God continues to heal me physically and emotionally as He guides me through my weight loss journey. As I said earlier, I am not done. I still have about thirty pounds to go before getting to the recommended weight for my height. However, I am still letting God hold the reigns on this issue. Food consumed my thoughts at home and I don't want it to become a focus while I am here. So I am going to continue eating as I have been, exercising when possible and let God do the rest. Sudan has enough challenges and if I want a piece of cake, I am going to have a piece of cake. No matter what weight I end up with, I am learning to be confident as I am which is simply someone who loves the Lord and seeks to find my identity in Him alone, following Him wherever He takes me. Even though this makes me cringe, I will close by posting a picture of me when I left and one of me taken within the last few weeks. It's still hard for me not to be ashamed of where I was. Perhaps one day I will be brave enough to share my starting and current weight. That day is not today! It's a journey I am still on.
(In case anyone is curious - this is from my 30th birthday cruise. I was randomly picked to participate in a trivia game. I smoked the competition.)
(With Pritty, our pharmacist and Elaine, she was here with her husband Paul for three weeks)
June 10, 2010:
Today I want to share with you part of my testimony. I want to tell you about an issue I struggle with and how God is giving me victory in that area. It's very personal and I didn't want to share it initially and wasn't planning on sharing it ever. However, I read a verse yesterday that seemed to describe what I have been going through and I felt the Holy Spirit telling me to share it. Because it's embarrassing and I am ashamed of that struggle, I still thought about doing another devotion. I tried to prepare for another topic but it wasn't coming together so I gave in and thought more about this verse and prayed about what God wanted me to share.
Let's start with the verse:
Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us.
I have read this verse many times before, but yesterday it had new meaning for me. For many years I have struggled with one particular issue and that is my weight. In America we have access to lots of different types of food. Some is good for you and some is bad for you, even though it tastes really, really good. Often times, the food that is bad for you costs less than the food that is good for you. So, it makes it really easy to eat the bad food. The bad food makes you gain weight and therefore many Americans are overweight. I have to say it's awkward talking about this struggle in a place where most people don't have enough food and no one is overweight.
Not everyone who is overweight is dealing with a sinful habit. However in my case, it became a sin issue. Just like some people here are addicted to alcohol, I became addicted to food. I thought about it all the time and it began to affect my walk with God. As I gained weight, the enemy used that to discourage me. I began to believe his lies that I was worthless, that I was ugly and that no one would ever love me. As a result, I was not confident and was very unhappy with myself. I was ashamed of myself. I would avoid doing many things because I thought people wouldn't like me because of my weight. I lived a very fearful life that stopped me from doing things to serve God. My sin was getting in the way of me doing all I could for the Lord. And I believed the biggest lie of all: this was something I could never conquer.
When I came here, I was determined not to let my weight stop me from serving God to the fullest. I didn't want it to hold me back anymore. There were some difficult moments where the enemy would try to discourage me and make me feel like I couldn't be used here. Whenever those thoughts crept in, I turned to God. I prayed for the strength not to worry about things people said. Who I am does not depend on other people's opinions of me, but only what God thinks of me. My identity doesn't rely on what I look like, but who I am on the inside, through Christ. Because I reclaimed my identity in Christ, I began not to worry so much about my weight. Slowly, God began to heal my heart which had been scarred from many years of hating myself. He helped me rebuke the enemy's lies and I found myself being ok with who I am, because I was not judging myself on the world's standards anymore, but on God's.
As God began to heal me on the inside, he also began to heal me on the outside. I started to lose weight even though I wasn't trying to. Because I was away from the bad food at home, I was more active and drank more water, the extra weight began to fall off.
A couple months ago, Suzy and I started exercising. Yesterday, we ran for a long time (for us) without stopping. That was a big accomplishment for me because I could have never done that before. When we first started, I could barely run one minute. Yesterday, we ran for fifteen minutes without stopping.
So, when I came across this verse, it perfectly symbolized what was going on with my struggle with weight. Let's read it again:
Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by a cloud of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us.
I literally am taking off the weight that has slowed me down and became a sin. And we should never forget, people are watching us. We are representatives of Christ and we need to be a good example. Some sins we can hide and people may never know we struggle with them. My sin was out there for all to see. Again, I want to be clear, not everyone with extra weight has a sinful struggle with it, but I do. My self hatred and lack of confidence was not a Christ honoring example for people to see. I still am not all the way there; I have more weight to lose and food will continue to be an area I have to be careful in. But, I need to acknowledge the victory I have received through Christ. I hate looking at pictures of me when I first came here because I am ashamed. However, I don't need to be because God has claimed victory over that area in my life. He still is working in me and I don't need to be ashamed about it.
So, I would encourage you to examine your own lives. See if there is any sin that is holding you back and trapping you. Then pray and ask God to release that sin and claim victory. Never believe Satan's lie that it is too hard to overcome. Nothing is impossible with God. If I can run 15 minutes without stopping which is a true miracle for me, you can over come the sin that is holding you back. And then don't be ashamed to tell people about it. Be proud of God's work in your life.
Since sharing that devotion, I have lost an additional 20 pounds and was able to jog (slowly!) for 40 minutes without stopping. God continues to heal me physically and emotionally as He guides me through my weight loss journey. As I said earlier, I am not done. I still have about thirty pounds to go before getting to the recommended weight for my height. However, I am still letting God hold the reigns on this issue. Food consumed my thoughts at home and I don't want it to become a focus while I am here. So I am going to continue eating as I have been, exercising when possible and let God do the rest. Sudan has enough challenges and if I want a piece of cake, I am going to have a piece of cake. No matter what weight I end up with, I am learning to be confident as I am which is simply someone who loves the Lord and seeks to find my identity in Him alone, following Him wherever He takes me. Even though this makes me cringe, I will close by posting a picture of me when I left and one of me taken within the last few weeks. It's still hard for me not to be ashamed of where I was. Perhaps one day I will be brave enough to share my starting and current weight. That day is not today! It's a journey I am still on.
(In case anyone is curious - this is from my 30th birthday cruise. I was randomly picked to participate in a trivia game. I smoked the competition.)
(With Pritty, our pharmacist and Elaine, she was here with her husband Paul for three weeks)
Story Telling
Yesterday, Margaret and I went back to the prison for our weekly meeting/Bible Study with Rebecca. When we got there, the courtyard was packed. The previous times we were there, it was very quiet; only the prisoners sat outside under a tree. This time there were about 100 people there. It turns out they were distributing uniforms to the police and prison guards so all these people were waiting to receive theirs. With so many people around, it was very chaotic. I wasn't going to be able to have the quiet Bible study I had hoped for. Margaret and I took Rebecca to the side and sat with her under a tree. We chatted for a bit and asked how she was feeling. She said she was feeling ok. Her hair was all over the place so Margaret offered to braid it for her. While we talked, one of the female prison wardens approached us and told us they charge five pounds for visiting. She must have thought we were new to Tonj and she could con us out of money. Not today lady! We told her Fidel Majok (the head of the prison) gave us permission to come whenever we wanted to. Once she heard his name, she left us alone!
As Margaret braided Rebecca's hair, I pulled out my journal with my Bible study notes. I looked at it and decided what I had planned was not going to work. I planned on discussing suffering and trusting in God's sovereignty. I had lots of verses and analogies I wanted to share. With so many people around and various distractions, it was clear I needed to save it for another time. Instead I said a quick prayer and asked God what he wanted me to share. For some reason I felt led to share the story of Joseph. We told one of the prison wardens that we were going to talk about the Bible and asked if anyone else wanted to join us. She did along with a few other prisoners. I began to tell the story of Joseph with the help of Peter, our translator. Gradually, more people came over to listen, including some children. The story is quite long and I wondered if I could hold their attention. They listened really well. When I got to the end and shared the point of my story “what man intended for bad, God intended for good,” they seemed to understand what I was getting at. Sometimes we have to go through a really hard trial to reach a good outcome. If Joseph wasn't sold into slavery, all of Egypt (and his own family!) may have been wiped out during the famine. I encouraged them to trust in God. I assured them He sees their pain and loves them so much. I told them to seek strength from Him through prayer and through Scripture. After an hour, the ladies had to get back to work. One lady, Mary, thanked us for coming. She said that has heard about God and the Bible, but no one encouraged her to study the Bible and get to know God. She was excited about learning more. Then she asked us to pray for them.
It was a really neat time. I learned the power of a story. We can do research and plan a long study, but for them, a simple story alone can say so much. I recalled how Jesus taught through parables and wondered if this is what it was like back then: people gathered under a tree, listening to a story. It was one of the most memorable and meaningful moments I have experienced here. It was so simple, yet they were captivated... and they got the point.
Before we left, we met with some of the prisoners who were sick. We took their complaints and will drop off some medication today. I can't wait until next week!
As Margaret braided Rebecca's hair, I pulled out my journal with my Bible study notes. I looked at it and decided what I had planned was not going to work. I planned on discussing suffering and trusting in God's sovereignty. I had lots of verses and analogies I wanted to share. With so many people around and various distractions, it was clear I needed to save it for another time. Instead I said a quick prayer and asked God what he wanted me to share. For some reason I felt led to share the story of Joseph. We told one of the prison wardens that we were going to talk about the Bible and asked if anyone else wanted to join us. She did along with a few other prisoners. I began to tell the story of Joseph with the help of Peter, our translator. Gradually, more people came over to listen, including some children. The story is quite long and I wondered if I could hold their attention. They listened really well. When I got to the end and shared the point of my story “what man intended for bad, God intended for good,” they seemed to understand what I was getting at. Sometimes we have to go through a really hard trial to reach a good outcome. If Joseph wasn't sold into slavery, all of Egypt (and his own family!) may have been wiped out during the famine. I encouraged them to trust in God. I assured them He sees their pain and loves them so much. I told them to seek strength from Him through prayer and through Scripture. After an hour, the ladies had to get back to work. One lady, Mary, thanked us for coming. She said that has heard about God and the Bible, but no one encouraged her to study the Bible and get to know God. She was excited about learning more. Then she asked us to pray for them.
It was a really neat time. I learned the power of a story. We can do research and plan a long study, but for them, a simple story alone can say so much. I recalled how Jesus taught through parables and wondered if this is what it was like back then: people gathered under a tree, listening to a story. It was one of the most memorable and meaningful moments I have experienced here. It was so simple, yet they were captivated... and they got the point.
Before we left, we met with some of the prisoners who were sick. We took their complaints and will drop off some medication today. I can't wait until next week!
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Refuge from the Storm
We have had quite a lot of rain lately. It poured Monday night. Around 2:00am, I heard one big meow and three small meows. I opened my door and saw Sasha and her babies huddling underneath a chair outside my room. Against my better judgment, I let them in where they slept on my action packer (a box holding supplies) for the night. Who could resist their cute little, wet faces?
I would pay for my mercy the next day when I couldn't get those little terrors out of my room. I have a gap between my door and the frame that is just big enough for them to squeeze through. So whenever I came in my room, they were there even though I had already shooed them out. I love them, but I don't want to encourage them to be in there. I don't need a room filled with cat poop and fleas.
I would pay for my mercy the next day when I couldn't get those little terrors out of my room. I have a gap between my door and the frame that is just big enough for them to squeeze through. So whenever I came in my room, they were there even though I had already shooed them out. I love them, but I don't want to encourage them to be in there. I don't need a room filled with cat poop and fleas.
Wellness Update
Praise God, people are on the mend. Thank you for your prayers. We are all starting to feel better. Stephanie was able to return to work today after her bout with malaria. Most of our staff have been able to return to work also. Your continued prayers for those still feeling under the weather would be appreciated. I am feeling better than I was on Sunday, but am still not feeling great. I don't handle pain/feeling sick well and think I have been a little cranky lately. Please pray I would be gracious to everyone I am talking to and have lots of patience.
Sabet left yesterday to spend two weeks with Suzy and the kids in Kenya. Although Suzy has been in Kenya for almost two weeks, she hasn't gotten much R&R since she still has so much work to do. Please pray for her and Sabet, that they will be able to enjoy complete rest as a family. Since they are both gone, I am overseeing things here. Pray that I will have the wisdom to handle whatever comes up so I won't have to bother them. I will admit I am anxious and already stressed out and Sabet hasn't been gone for 24 hours! As soon as we returned from dropping him off at the airstrip, problems were needing my attention. The problems continued this morning and I am feeling overwhelmed. I just want Sabet and Suzy to get rest and want to be able to handle things here for them.
Thanks for listening to me whine!
Sabet left yesterday to spend two weeks with Suzy and the kids in Kenya. Although Suzy has been in Kenya for almost two weeks, she hasn't gotten much R&R since she still has so much work to do. Please pray for her and Sabet, that they will be able to enjoy complete rest as a family. Since they are both gone, I am overseeing things here. Pray that I will have the wisdom to handle whatever comes up so I won't have to bother them. I will admit I am anxious and already stressed out and Sabet hasn't been gone for 24 hours! As soon as we returned from dropping him off at the airstrip, problems were needing my attention. The problems continued this morning and I am feeling overwhelmed. I just want Sabet and Suzy to get rest and want to be able to handle things here for them.
Thanks for listening to me whine!
Monday, August 23, 2010
Everyone is Sick!
Well, maybe not everyone, but many people are. Sabet, Stephanie, Dennis, Mercy, George and I have been sick as well as many of our Sudanese staff. After getting better from my stomach illness, I got hit with a headache and fever yesterday. Fortunately, I tested negative for malaria. Stephanie is positive though as are many of our employees. There are so many people coming to the clinic with malaria, but even more who never make it here from their houses. It's an illness that can be cured if caught early enough. Please pray for the healing of everyone on the compound so we can do our work and also pray that parents won't delay in seeking treatment for themselves or their children.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Pray for Mike and Amy Yordt
Mike and Amy Yordt will soon be in Sudan! They are leaving behind everything to serve full time in Tonj. I could not be more excited about that. I first met Mike while planning RdR's first trip to Sudan in August 2009. A month or two later, I met Amy when she joined our team. We first went to Tonj together in February of 2009. It's funny to think about that trip now. Amy and I were so freaked out that first day and didn't know how we were going to make it through the rest of the trip. However, God knew what was to come and planted seeds on that trip. Neither of us knew then that God would call us back. Mike and Amy came back with me in October 2009 and flew home a couple weeks later. It was very surreal to see them flying away and not be with them. A few months later, I was overjoyed when they told us they would be moving to Tonj. At the time, it seemed so far away. Now they will be here in two and a half weeks. Please pray for them as they finish preparations and say good-bye to family and friends. Pray that God provides all the support they need and give them peace as they start their new life in Tonj.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Amoebas Be Gone!
I am feeling so much better today. Once I was tested and we discovered the amoebas, we were able to get the medicine I needed from the market since we didn't have it at the clinic. I asked Dennis how much to take and he said there is only one dose. I was suspicious. Just one dose? Is this a wonder drug? How long until I feel better? His answer: three days. I was so worried three days would pass and I wouldn't feel better. Maybe I should take one dose for the next three days. Fortunately, I listed to him and took it as he prescribed. For the next two days I was in a lot of pain on and off throughout the day and night. The medicine I took to help reduce the pain was no longer in stock in the market or in our clinic so I just had to deal with it. By day three, I noticed a huge improvement and today I am almost pain free. It's incredible what damage such tiny microbes can do. I am still blown away by our lab capabilities. Accurate diagnosis is important and will help with quick recoveries. We don't have to go to Nairobi to test for these things anymore. It's hard to describe how HUGE this is especially for me since I seem to easily pick up stomach bugs (in the US as well as here.). I suffered for two months in May and June until I went to the doctor in Nairobi. Now, I don't have to wait. Praise God for the funds which allowed us to get the lab. I am overjoyed.
This morning we had a training on taking medical history. It was very helpful. We went through the body's organization and discussed the different systems. Then Dennis taught us the correct procedure to taking the patient's history:
1. Particulars
2. Chief Complaint
3. History of presenting illness
4. Review of other systems
5. Personal social/economic history
6. Family History
We discussed each one in detail and were given a format on how to present the information to the doctors and nurses. This will help us a lot. When we only have one doctor, he may take all day to see 150 patients on his own. If we can take the patient's history for him, he will be able to go faster and the patients won't have to wait as long. I didn't know a lot of this and now feel equipped to help out in that way.
Here are some of the model students...
(Me and Margaret)
(Stephanie and Pritty)
This morning we had a training on taking medical history. It was very helpful. We went through the body's organization and discussed the different systems. Then Dennis taught us the correct procedure to taking the patient's history:
1. Particulars
2. Chief Complaint
3. History of presenting illness
4. Review of other systems
5. Personal social/economic history
6. Family History
We discussed each one in detail and were given a format on how to present the information to the doctors and nurses. This will help us a lot. When we only have one doctor, he may take all day to see 150 patients on his own. If we can take the patient's history for him, he will be able to go faster and the patients won't have to wait as long. I didn't know a lot of this and now feel equipped to help out in that way.
Here are some of the model students...
(Me and Margaret)
(Stephanie and Pritty)
Stir Crazy? Possibly Just Crazy
We rarely get out of the compound. I could go weeks without ever leaving. Usually there is no reason to and no where to go. So, we can get a little silly and enjoy taking funny photos. Here are a few of my favorites I found while downloading pictures from Dennis' camera.
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